ADHD - My Regiment for Success

I know I have YET to finish part 2 of The First Signs of ADHD. It turns out quite well, or I should say, is turning out quite well. It's a process and a mindset that has to be revisited over and over, but there are SO many ways to improve life quickly and effectively. Here is my current list of QUICK helps for the issues I deal with:

1) Anytime I feel my mind spinning, I begin relaxing by breathing correctly. There is so much to say about the mindful breath - focusing on the way the breath feels as I let it expand in my lungs, and breathing out fully.

2) Next to Meditation is Medication - I find my life is much better since I started medication. At first I had to take something to calm me down, as I was in an utter panic. That was critical - so was the sleep that came with it. Next, I started regular Ritalain. I noticed that I was a little shakey at first. My psychiatrist (and this is key as well, don't try to have a general practitioner manage your ADD/ADHD. It's easy to manage it somewhat, but what you want is EXCELLENT management of your mind. This is NOT a priveledge for the rich and famous. For me, it was a big key to realize that I was going to have to invest money in a good psychiatrist, and not cut down on my meds due to cost, if I was going to make it BIG. One therapist told me that she never had an unmedicated ADD patient that didn't float to the lowest rung of responsibility in their life. I happen to know many that have done quite well, but they are people who have everything going for them, and are working primarily from their strengths. I know that medication doesn't work for some, and for others that it takes a long time for the doctor to get it right. Be patient with them.

3) Take vitamin and omega supplements - Omegas do wonders for so many other parts of your body, but for your mind, an Omega-3/Omega-6 pill twice a day carries a huge benefit for thinking and stability of emotion. Take lots of Vitamin C (and any other anti-oxidants you can get without going broke).

4) This goes back to Meditation, but it's so important. If you don't know what meditation is all about, find out. There are so many misconceptions about meditation, but it is basically exercise for the mind that helps you focus, and gives you brain muscle to get out of ruts. When you have recurrent thoughts, it's difficult to get out of the thinking rut because the neurons of your brain create a pretty solid pathway. Meditation for 15 minutes a day (and less as you get good) allows all the following documented benefits: better decision making through mental clarity, increased ability to reach peak performance for any activity, enables you to act rather than just react, enables you to manage change through greater awareness of your own state of flux, enables greater pleasure, opens up your senses, helps you have better relationships (b/c it helps you slow the mind down, and become a better listener, enhances emotional awareness, which is a HUGE key for a successful career (or relationship). There are many books and podcasts on the subject. My favorite podcast is called My Thought Coach, which is full of excellent meditations and affirmations. I recommend some book knowledge of the subject as well if this isn't intuitive for you. Thich Nhat Hahn has written many - a CD (which works great for ADDers) If you do Yoga, you will learn the meditation. I've enjoyed PM Yoga, which is really quite whimpy Yoga in the eyes of a Yoga Master, but this is perfect for relaxing the mind in a way that has all the benefits listed above.

5) Ask yourself at the start of every day "Why is everything that I want to have happen going to work out so much faster and so much more effectively than I ever dreamed?" Let your subconscious do the rest. This is SO powerful, as our mind will always bring back answers to the questions we ask. Have you noticed that when you ask "What else can go wrong?", that inevitably, something always goes wrong that day? How about "Why am I going to overcome the next obstacle so easily?" When you ask the second question, the inevitable negative event is perceived totally differently, and the body/mind reacts totally differently. Hope makes you strong. Practice STRONG thoughts BY asking questions that will elicit strong answers. This is another practice for getting out of the negative mind-chatter, after a good dose of meditation.

6) Accept that it doesn't change in one day, but at the same time, affirm over and over "everyday, in every way I get better and better", then replace better with stronger, smarter, healthier, happier, more resilient, more balanced, more full of love, closer to God, closer to my best self, and so forth. Accept that going through pain is inevitable, and rather than avoiding the pain, meditatively face the pain. Allow yourself to suffer, but in a way that affirms hope. I like to invite my negative, recurrent thoughts to "please come in, my dear old friend", and visualize myself in a peaceful room with another being. Sometimes the eyes are terrible, and the fists of the being are clenched. Sometimes I imagine THE person who I am feeling pain from. I ask them to please come in. Accepting that they WILL come in, and choosing to refrain from fighting the thoughts has a paradoxical affect. They lose their potency almost immediately. Sometimes they sit down, but they don't talk. I continue to smile, breathing in, breathing out. I nod my head to them as an old Chinese sage would to his worst enemy: offering them tea, patiently letting the tension dissolve. They will inevitably come back again. Offer them 'tea' a thousand times, but don't yell at them, or tell them to GO AWAY, or they will grow like the itch of scabies when scratched. This is letting go. This is buddist thought that westerners are learning to use more every year. It is wonderful stuff. It is the awakened mind. The CD by Thich Nhat Hahn, a very well known exhiled Vietnamese monk is called "The Art of Mindful Living". He has so much non the internet - it's the basis for stability and recovery.

7) Learn about Emotional Intelligence, and how to develop it. The basis is in meditation, and writing exercises that I won't go into in this blog, as time is short, but the 4 parts of Emotional Intelligence (E.I.) are 1)Self-Awareness 2)Self-Management 3)Interpersonal Awareness 4)Interpersonal Management. It starts with self, and the key to being aware of what you are thinking and how you are acting is the first step. When you notice your stress needle is starting to point to the yellow or red, you begin step 2 - to manage the stress. To say "Hey, I'm really starting to feel upset" rather than to simply get lost in emotional thought without ever really noticing. when you notice, you can exercise the mental muscle that you have developed through meditation.

8) Exercise. Find a way to get that jogging, or even walking in several times a week. Get your pulse UP. Get the blood to clear out your mind and body. Ideally, 20 minutes of good running, or whatever, with positive affirmations along the way. I like to chant positive things while I jog, such as the "Every day in every way" phrase, or "Strength in the body, strength in the mind, strength in my heart - I feel myself getting stronger in every way". It's amazing how the seeds of these planted thoughts will flourish when the dung of life is thrown at you. It's fertilizer! Hey, what do you know? We have potential for growth! That's why it hurts - because God wants us to grow. Exercise results in a body/mind that is invigorated, and able to relax. As Abraham Lincoln said "If I had 30 minutes to cut a tree down, I'd spend 20 sharpening the saw". We can't afford to let our mind or body go dull. It WILL get dull, despite our efforts, but that is precisely when we kick in some positive scripting that we've practiced.

9) Link emotion to a movement that is easy to do. When I am running full speed, and feeling full of CAN DO emotion, I pull up thoughts of overcoming difficult obstacles that actually happened, in detail, then tap my thumb to my pointer and middle finger with both hands. This is a commonly taught psychological technique that Anthony Robbins promoted. I like it. It works. I touch my thumb to my pinky finger when I need to relax - to start to breath deeply. It takes some time to program yourself, but you will know it and feel the difference when you have created these links.
I am an orthodontist, and often encounter thumb suckers. Out of curiosity, I always ask them to show me where their teeth hit their thumb. Inevitably, if I have them press down on that spot with their fingers (from the other hand), they say it causes their whole body to feel calm and relaxed. This isn't new - it's ritual stuff that anyone understands. Part of the reason smokers calm down (and I don't recommend smoking) is that they are breathing deeply, and performing a ritual. If they put a TWIG in their hand that rests like a cigarette, it helps them a bit. If they can suck through something that resembles a cigarette, and BREATH, and do THEIR ritual, it has a very calming effect. Building rituals that relax and calm you, as well as rituals that help you to conjure up the feelings of motivation INSTANTLY is wonderful - especially when you have ADD, or other mind related issues.

Well, I must go! Hope this helps someone, because it changed my life!